If Sita accompanied Rama to the jungle, it was not to lead a normal householder's life with him. The life in the forest, though the couple were together, had its own special ways, observing continence and restraint. The person in exile is supposed to lead a life like a hermit, keeping his mind away from physical pleasures. It is no ordinary task to observe restraint for a person, especially when his very loving wife accompanies him. That then becomes extraordinary. That is why we see Rama - in Valmiki - forewarning Sita. 'Do not think that it is a pleasure trip that we are undertaking.'
"A forest life is full of misery," he tells her. "Exhausted through toil (entailed by search fallen of
themselves). Hence a forest is a source of great suffering. By day and by night hunger has to be appeased with one's mind fully controlled by means of fruits fall of themselves from trees, O Sita! Hence a forest is full of privations. Fasting has to be observed according to one's stamina, O princes of Mithila! (Nay), a mass of matted hair has to be worn (on the head) and one has to remain clad in the bark of trees." (Valmiki Ramayana, Ayodhya Kanda, Canto XXVIII, Sloka 11-13)
We are supposed to lead the life of an ascetic, void of conjugal pleasures. We are supposed to control our minds. He emphasises again, "Anger and greed have to be completely abandoned, one's heart has to be set on asceticism." (Ibid, Sloka 24) Setting one's mind on continence becomes extra difficult with the presence of the spouse, a loving spouse at that. That basically might have been the reason for Rama hesitating to take her with him.
'That is not at all difficult for me. Let me just remain by your side and render the services that a wife is supposed to do in every other way,' Sita tells him, understanding what he means. Wearing matted hair and tree bark are external matters, symbolising the kind of life one is supposed to live. Internalising and experiencing the rigorous life of an ascetic requires the strength of the will and the strength of the soul. That is why we see the couple's intimate moments are limited to exchange of glances, smiles etc. There is no doubt that she rose up to every demand of the situation. But she melts the heart of the readers when Rama asks for the tree bark to be brought, for them to take leave.
As we had occasion to mention, this scene takes place a good 19 cantos later in Valmiki Ramayana, after Rama is asked to go on exile. It is Rama who asks for the tree bark to be brought. 'I have given up the elephant. What is the use of tether for me!' he tells Dasaratha, who insists that a detachment of army should follow Rama with all the resources. 'Let all the army, all the wealth remain here for the enjoyment of Bharata. I am not going to take anything with me,' he says firmly. And then he turns to the maidservants of Kaikeyi. "Let the servant-maids of mother Kaikeyi bring me robes fit for a dweller in forests alone. (Addressing the maid-servants he continues), go and duly bring a spade and a basket both for me, who am going to take up my abode in a forest for fourteen years." (Ibid, Sloka 4 and 5)
Rama uttered these words to the maidservants of Kaikeyi. But Kaikeyi seems to be eager to have the pleasure of doing that herself. She did not wait for the maids to move. Instead she quickly brought them, herself. "Personally bringing pieces of bark (for being put on by Sri Rama and others), Kaikeyi, who was lost to (all shame), forthwith said to Sri Rama in the midst of that concourse of men, "Put these on." (Ibid, Sloka 6)
She did so 'in the concourse of men,' when so many of them were present. Now, they have to change their robes and wear tree bark. Rama and Lakshmana had no difficulty. But what about
Sita!
If Sita accompanied Rama to the jungle, it was not to lead a normal householder's life with him. The life in the forest, though the couple were together, had its own special ways, observing continence and restraint. The person in exile is supposed to lead a life like a hermit, keeping his mind away from physical pleasures. It is no ordinary task to observe restraint for a person, especially when his very loving wife accompanies him. That then becomes extraordinary. That is why we see Rama - in Valmiki - forewarning Sita. 'Do not think that it is a pleasure trip that we are undertaking.'
'That is not at all difficult for me. Let me just remain by your side and render the services that a wife is supposed to do in every other way,' Sita tells him, understanding what he means. Wearing matted hair and tree bark are external matters, symbolising the kind of life one is supposed to live. Internalising and experiencing the rigorous life of an ascetic requires the strength of the will and the strength of the soul. That is why we see the couple's intimate moments are limited to exchange of glances, smiles etc. There is no doubt that she rose up to every demand of the situation. But she melts the heart of the readers when Rama asks for the tree bark to be brought, for them to take leave. 
Rama uttered these words to the maidservants of Kaikeyi. But Kaikeyi seems to be eager to have the pleasure of doing that herself. She did not wait for the maids to move. Instead she quickly brought them, herself. "Personally bringing pieces of bark (for being put on by Sri Rama and others), Kaikeyi, who was lost to (all shame), forthwith said to Sri Rama in the midst of that concourse of men, "Put these on." (Ibid, Sloka 6)
